I was mauled for my supper last night. Listening to the people around me it seems as if happiness is even less worthy of serious consideration than David Icke’s theories on world government. I was surrounded by people who believe in the virtues of cosmetic surgery as a means of enhancing quality of life and defying our genetic heritage. Yet, when it comes to happiness, the overwhelming consensus was that either one is born happy, or one isn’t and there is nothing that can be done to alter that.
Quoting statistics or books and papers that no-one else has read is not a persuasive strategy for a dinner conversation and I’m belatedly learning that I need to learn another one. I argued that studies by Lykken and others show that we have a happiness set-point that is genetically related, but that this only contributes fifty per cent of our overall happiness level. Of the other fifty per cent, ten per cent depends upon our circumstances and the remaining forty reflects our voluntary actions. So, our behaviour and attitudes have a powerful influence on our happiness levels.
There were the usual cat-calls that alcohol consumption is therefore a significant contribution to happiness. There were derisory comments about the cognitive tyranny of positive thinking that blames the victims of unhappiness for their victimhood rather than attributing it to the blight of poor socio-economic circumstances.
I argued yet again that positive psychology is about far more than positive thinking, it’s about living a life that is fulfilled by the proper use of our character strengths and virtues. The words character and virtues shocked most of those present and were repeated in disbelief. So, I was startled when an Aristotle-quoting Russell Crowe figure entered the fray to support my claim that happiness is a topic that is worthy of our attention, energy and cultivation.
men become builders by building houses, and harpists by playing the harp. Similarly, we become just by the practice of just actions, self-controlled by exercising self-control, and courageous by performing acts of courage. (Bk II, Nicomachean Ethics)
It seems as if we can become happy by practising those activities that make us happy. And sometimes these actions are small and simple. A study by Sonja Lyubomirsky and her colleagues reported that those students who were instructed to perform five acts of kindness for one day a week for six weeks were happier at the close of the study than the control group who had received no such instructions.
I don’t think that quoting Aristotle is going to help me explain my belief in a happystance to others. But it is a simpler and more effective story than most of the stories that I use and is therefore a useful lesson. We can behave as if we are happy and it may influence our development and the way that we experience our lives.
Copyright 2005, Tony Plant Happystance Project
Sonja Lyubomirsky | kindness | happystance | happiness | depression | aristotle | alcohol

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